Here’s what you can get at the Atlanta Ritz Carlton for $64.16

This morning Yahoo! appeared to rock the college basketball world with their revelations on ASM Sports’ shady dealings and what implications it might have in terms of the NCAA. Christian Dawkins, who was arrested by the FBI in September, is at the center of the scandal. Some of the allegations concern larger sums - like NC State’s Dennis Smith getting upwards of $70k - while others seem like one-sided meals with players and various family members.

According to Yahoo!’s report of ASM Sports’ expense reports, he took:

• UNC’s Brice Johnson to Carrabas ($100.09)
• Duke’s Wendell Carter’s mother to Longhorn ($106.36)
• Texas’ Isaiah Taylor to PF Changs ($146.36)
• Clemson’s Jaron Blossomgame to Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse ($173.25)
• Virginia’s Malcolm Brogdon’s mother (Dr. Jann Adams) to the Ritz-Carlton ($64.16)

I won’t comment on the restaurants, but...

[side note: I’ll die on the PF Chang’s hill. Get me some lettuce wraps, pork dumplings, and chicken fried rice let’s roll.]

Now, if Dawkins only paid for his meal—and there is no indication or insinuation on the expense report that he even paid for Dr. Adams’s meal—then there is no violation of NCAA rules. Dr. Adams herself said that there was no meeting, according to an interview with the Daily Progress Friday morning.

So, what stands out as questionable in all of this right off the bat is this: what on Earth could two people get at the Ritz for $64.14? This calls for some Serious Professional Journalism.

Let’s take a look. You can find the menu for the Atlanta Ritz-Carlton here (we are using Atlanta as a reference as that’s where Brogdon is from). Now, let’s assume that Dawkins is a normal tipper and tipped 18% on the bill. That takes $9.17 out. Meals tax in Georgia is 8%, which takes another $4.07 out, leaving us with a whopping $50.92 that Mr. Dawkins had to spend on a meal for two at the Ritz - if in fact that’s what happened.

Next, we have to take out all the things on the menu that are over $50. That eliminates the:

• 18oz. Cowboy Ribeye ($51)
• 18oz. KC Strip 28 Days Dry Aged ($65)
• 32oz. 28 Days Dry Aged Porterhouse ($130)
• 14oz. Masami Beef Ribeye ($110)
• AG Oscar Filet Surf and Turf ($72)

I’m going to assume in this hypothetical you’d order an iced tea at the very least, so two of those would take out another, let’s say, $5. That leaves about $45 for two meals.

That eliminates the entire “Specialty Entrees” section (minus the one Tofu exception below).

I’m also going to eliminate Beef Tartare ($19), the Squid Ink Tortelloni ($22), and something called an Egg Mimosa ($13), because ew. Also, I’m gonna just skip all the soups, because c’mon, who gets a soup at a fancy restaurant on a business dinner?

So theoretically, two people could each get an entree at the Atlanta Ritz-Carlton for $45 if they:

Each get a Crispy BBQ Tofu ($23 ea.) and agree to not order any drinks except water

Here’s a list of the appetizers or salads they could mix and match:

• Fried Green Tomatoes ($12)
• Shrimp Cocktail ($18)
• Braised Pork Belly as an appetizer ($18)
• Braised Spanish Octopus ($20)
• Caesar Salad ($13)
• Charred Pear Salad ($14)
• Tip of the Iceberg [LOL at that aptly named salad] ($14)
• Mix and match of steak sides ($10 ea.)

Which would make for literally the worst business meal ever.

Long story short, this appears to be more of a situation where Dawkins bought himself a nice dinner and listed it as a meal with Dr. Adams, or they really need to improve their wooing of potential clients. I don’t plan on losing much sleep over Creamed Kale.