clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

ACC football teams as characters from The Simpsons

New, 5 comments

Before we commit ourselves fully back into the season again, here’s one more very important offseason discussion point

ACC Football Championship - Clemson v Miami Photo by Mike Comer/Getty Images
Join the Streaking the Lawn team and fellow readers at the STL tailgate to kick off the 2018 campaign! Follow the link to RSVP so that we know how much food and beverages to provide. Thanks to our friends at Snowing in Space for sponsoring the tailgate, and for making the best nitro cold brew in the business!

I know, I know, it’s late August and we’re approaching the final throes of the offseason. But I don’t think I’m the only one still very bored and not-so-patiently waiting for opening day. In that vein, here’s something I’ve thought about doing for awhile: comparing ACC football teams to characters from one of my favorite TV shows, The Simpsons.

Atlantic Division

Boston College Eagles: Between the accent and their status as a transplant from well outside of the conference’s geographical footprint, they’re just a little out-of-place. But with a $2.3 billion endowment, they certainly aren’t lacking for money. Mayor Quimby.

Clemson Tigers: A little brash or even arrogant, sure, but there’s a reason everyone tunes in to watch when they’re on TV. Kent Brockman.

Florida State Seminoles: An unmatched history and legacy compared to their peers, mixed with a little bit of evil, makes them easy to be jealous of and maybe even hate a little bit. Mr. Burns.

Louisville Cardinals: We don’t know where they came from or why they’re here, but we’ll humor them in the meantime. Poochie.

N.C. State Wolfpack: This dog is a huge part of why we’re all here in the first place. Santa’s Little Helper.

Syracuse Orange: A ham-handed bunch from upstate New York that frequently gets steamed by their opponents. Principal Skinner.

Wake Forest Demon Deacons: Rooted in Christianity and everyone’s favorite neighbor. Ned Flanders.

Coastal Division

Duke Blue Devils: Best known in the 1990s for electrocuting themselves out of insanity. Frank Grimes.

Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets: Nerds who always give their best effort, regardless of how they’re perceived by the outside world. Martin Prince.

Miami Hurricanes: The hell-raisers of the late ‘80s and early ‘90s with an attitude to match. You either loved or hated them. Bart Simpson.

North Carolina Tar Heels: A preeminent figure from the beginning, they’re Duke's old rival and never finished their degree. Homer Simpson.

Pittsburgh Panthers: see also Louisville Cardinals.

Virginia Cavaliers: They’re the only charter member of the Coastal Division to have never played in the ACC championship game. They’ve almost had a couple licks at that shiny brass ring but just haven’t closed the sale. Gil Gunderson.

Virginia Tech Hokies: The slack-jawed yokel from the boondocks. Cletus Spuckler.

Poll

How did I do?

This poll is closed

  • 26%
    A
    (54 votes)
  • 25%
    B
    (52 votes)
  • 9%
    C
    (20 votes)
  • 9%
    D
    (20 votes)
  • 28%
    F
    (58 votes)
204 votes total Vote Now