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#SWOON and Desist: A Special Notice from STL Legal

Because you do NOT come up in here and try and take our #SWOON game

By Paul Wiley
#SWOON
#SWOON
USA TODAY Sports

What follows is a special notice from STL's crack legal team. By which we mean it cracked us up.

FROM: The Firm of Leung, Campbell and Wiley, "Attorneys" at Blog
TO: The dastardly scoundrels known as Land Grant Holy Land
DATE: September 30, 2013
RE: Immediate cessation of #SWOON-related activities
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Dear Sirs:

It has come to our attention that you have appended the #SWOON tag to one Aaron Craft of the Ohio State men's basketball team. See Exhibit A, below. As #SWOON is only in reference to the inimitable Joe Harris, we must insist that you cease and desist your infringement of our swoontellectual property.

The history of #SWOON has been well documented before on this very blog. Its use dates to December 18, 2011, first tweet-uttered by our lovable local illiterate Will Campbell. See Exhibit B, below. It gained footing with the Fireball-enhanced tweeting of our Dear Leader and "Editor" in Chief. Then we added a girl to the staff and she will just not shut up about #SWOON no seriously you should read the emails.

The label is also apt. Harris was named Athlon's Top Shooter in their 2013–14 preview. (If I were inclined to make this personal, I'd point out there's a Wolverine ranked on that list too, but no Buckeyes. But I don't want to make it personal. So I won't.) Joe was named first-team All-ACC by the ACC coaches, the Atlantic Coast Sports Media Association (WE DON'T UNDERSTAND PACE) and kenpom.com (EMBRACE THE PACE). He started a school-record 35 games. He is second all-time at Virginia in three-point percentage. And just look at him, he's dreamy.

This is to take nothing away from Mr. Craft. I'm sure he's nice too. Probably worthy of a solid case of the vapors or some marked vertigo. But not a full-on #SWOON. And besides, this is the only positive offensive performer we have to look forward to for the next couple months. Y'all got Braxton Miller AND Kenny Guiton. Let us have this one.

#SWOONcerely,

STL Legal

EXHIBIT A:

EXHIBIT B:

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